Hi there! My name is Maurice, and I’m a mandrill.

But I’m not just any mandrill. I’m a mandrill with a passion for… yep, you guessed it – PORN!

I absolutely love watching and reviewing all the best porn sites. In fact, there’s never really a time in my home when porn isn’t playing on at least one screen somewhere… and I have a lot of screens – like, more screens than any sane person (or mandrill) should have

Anyway, welcome to my online porn review site! Let me show you around.

My story

For years now I’ve been navigating the complex and fascinating world of online porn. Unfortunately, while I’ve had my share of great experiences, I’ve also encountered many shady porn sites. At one point, I broke down, and I asked myself the hardest question I’ve ever had to ask:

Is it really worth getting a computer virus, or compromising the security of my credit card information, just so I can see some boobies?

No, friends. The answer is no. I don’t want anybody to have to experience the hardships I’ve experienced from not being able to find reliable, safe, and trustworthy porn sites online.

So, I took it upon myself to try to collect and review all the best porn sites around so that you can avoid the common pitfalls and get straight to enjoying the good stuff!

Mission Statement

My mission with this site is to help porn lovers in two main ways:

– Help porn lovers avoid dodgy, shady, sketchy, untrustworthy sites

– Help porn lovers save money by getting access to high-quality site reviews

Here are the pillars of the MyOnlinePorn site:

Mission statement item
A Site Built for You

I created www.myonlineporn.com with you – the user – in mind. So, I designed the site and its content with the user in mind as well. This site is built just for you, so that you can have the absolute best porn experience possible.

Mission statement item
Filtered Process

I go through an intense process to decide which sites are included and reviewed here. I look at each site from every single angle. In short, I leave no stone unturned when reviewing these sites so that, ultimately, you can save time and money when looking for your own favorite site to visit.

Mission statement item
Search Functionality

This site is optimized so that you can search for and find exactly what you’re looking for. I review a lot of sites, and I don’t plan on stopping any time soon. Find anything you like on the site by using the search bar.

Mission statement item
Site Reviews

Don’t waste your money and don’t compromise the safety of your technology by visiting bad porn sites. Instead, get access to thorough, honest, trustworthy, and informative reviews of all the best and safest porn sites.

Your porn viewing experience just leveled up!

Core Values

Everything I do at MyOnlinePorn is guided by three core values:

My goal is to give you honest, trustworthy information to work with. Don’t worry – my preferences and tastes for different porn sites don’t factor into my reviews. Instead, I try to give as much objective information as possible in a way that is clear, reliable, and impartial.


At the end of the day, you’re the one who is going to choose the porn site that you jerk it to – I don’t want to tell you what kind of porn to watch. I’m here to give you quality information so that you can make smart decisions about how to keep your computer safe and how not to waste your money on crappy sites.


Maybe you don’t have porn playing 24/7 where you live, and that’s fine. But we probably have at least one thing in common: when you’re in the mood to watch some good ol’ sex stuff, you don’t want to deal with the headaches of computer viruses and pop-ups, and you don’t want to waste your money on crappy sites. We’re in the same boat.